Noel's Reflection
by Storm VII
Summary: Noel reflects on her life with Ragna...


_**Noel's Reflection**_

 **(Cue Super Paper Mario** _Mix Memory_ **)**

"Sorry it took me so long. A certain masked asshole wouldn't take no for an answer. Whatever you do, stay behind me."

That was when I first met him, when I was first saved by him. I remember him standing in front of me, protectively. I couldn't understand why he was doing this, shouldn't he be trying to kill me? We were enemies… weren't we? Then he turned his head to face me for a moment and I realized, he wasn't the one I'd seen in the poster, not at all. He was the one I'd seen in my dreams, the one who'd helped nurse me when I was sick, though I had no memories of it, the one I called my brother.

He'd fought with the girl that I later realized was Murakumo unit like I was. The fight was brutal and just as it looked like he was about to win, he froze and was impaled. I remember him going over the edge with the girl, about to fall into the cauldron while I screamed. By the time I realized what I was doing, I'd already saved him, saved the life of the most wanted man in history…

...Saved the life of Ragna the Bloodedge.

My memory was more or less of blur after that, Ragna to this day claims that I screamed at him for several minutes before crying into his chest and calling him an idiot, but I still can't remember it. When I woke up later I was complete mess, trying read the NOL's version of the Miranda rights, but mixing up every sentence. He didn't seem to taken aback with it then or even seem to care, he just sat and told me to take a breath.

I wanted to ask him so much then, but then Captain Haza- No, Yuki Terumi showed up. I didn't know about my powers at the time, how I was the Eye of the Azure, so I observed him. When I saw Ragna look at him all I could see was hatred, he wanted to kill him and he didn't want it to be quick. Hazama left before the two came to blows thanks to Miss Rachel, but I knew we hadn't seen the last of him.

...A little while later we were out of the NOL branch. Ragna and I stood on the top of the rooftop for about ten minutes, but he didn't say anything to me. When he spoke to me I felt like the gentle side I'd seen in him was completely gone, he was much more hostile, much more vulgar. I'd left, even though I'd wanted to ask him so many more questions. What's worse was the fact that I'd destroyed any chance of getting to talk to him, saying we'd be enemies the next time we met.

I was wrong, we weren't enemies… he ended up saving me a second time. After Terumi had captured me and smelted me into my Murakumo form I lost the old me. There was only one thing I remember hearing in that time.

"What the hell were you thinking going down to that level?! Kusanagi!? The god-killing sword!? Screw all of that! You're Noel Vermillion aren't you!?"

It was Ragna trying to remind me of who I was and when I became self aware he was there with me holding me in one of his arms. But what I heard him say next still sometimes gives me cold chills to this day.

"The things I do for you."

At first I didn't understand what he'd meant when he said it, then when my vision cleared I understood. He'd been shot through, which was already slowly healing, but as he slowly fell forward I realized why he was only holding me with one arm… he'd lost the other one, his last natural one. He'd sacrificed it to bring me back, to save me...

I'd screamed at him as he laid his head in my lap, calling him an idiot as I cried, even though what I really knew I should've said was thank you… He didn't even seem to mind that he'd lost the arm, telling me that he still had one left that he could use. It turned out that it wasn't the end of surprises for that day, because I then discovered that Jin Kisaragi was his younger brother and the Imperator… apparently she was their little sister.

About a month later, we saw each other again in Ikaruga, but Ragna was different. He seemed almost feral, trying to force me to go with him to find Kushinada lynchpin. I'd tried to tell him that I need to find Tsubaki, but he wouldn't have it. Kagura showed up and knocked him out when he was weakened, but I was still scared with what Ragna was becoming.

When we were keeping him in his cell he'd seemed to go back to being the same vulgar man that I'd remembered him being in his bad times. That new girl that had joined us, the redhead named Celica, it was obvious that she was upsetting him for some reason, kind of like how he was when we first met. Still… the way she acted so cheerful around him, acting like she knew him, I started to get jealous. I tried my best not to show it, but the feeling was still there…

That night while I was asleep I was attacked by the black seither blob Arakune. Kagura had been the one to defeat the monster, but Ragna had managed to break the sealed down where no one else had been able to, even without his Azure Grimoire working. Makoto had told me that Kagura had said Ragna was starting to realize just what he was, but I didn't know what either of them meant by that at the time.

The next day Makoto, Major Kisaragi, and I managed to save Tsubaki from the Mind Eater curse. Makoto and I spent most of the day with her, but that evening I found Ragna in the hallway thinking to himself. We talked for a little bit and it looked like he was starting to revert to the caring side that I remembered seeing in him. He'd said that there was somewhere he'd wanted to go with me the next day.

I didn't really react the best, at the time I thought that he was actually asking me on a date, but in reality he only wanted my help with something and that Celica and Miss Rachel were coming with us. I was still a little flustered, but I also didn't exactly hide my disappointment. Ragna was dense so he didn't even realize we I'd thought. Jin had shown up later, shoving me out of the way like he normally did. It looked like he and Ragna were about to fight again, but I'd somehow managed to stop them.

There was a lot that happened between us after that, fighting against Takemikazuchi together, having to watch Ragna lose control of himself, and of course our final battle. But the most important moment came a year after the war had finished.

"A family?" he'd repeated. "I dunno, I mean maybe I'd like to start one. Never really thought about it."

I only barely realized that I'd voice the question aloud. We were sitting next to each other on the couch in Ragna's apartment watching a movie on the Television when I'd asked. We hadn't really gotten close or anything, at that point we'd never gone out on a single date. Living together was more of a convenience for us than a relationship and none of it was particularly romantic; Ragna managed to have another income to pay off the apartment's rent and I had someone to cook for me (which Ragna strictly forbade me from doing). Ragna owned a restaurant and I was working for the new government. My parents had stopped by from time to time to make sure I was doing okay, but they didn't really seem to mind the idea of us living together… so this came as a surprise to both of us.

"Oh…" I said to him after he answered trying to force down the blush that I knew I was giving off. The character's in the mystery show we were watching were still talking in the background, probably giving crucial information to the plot, I didn't hear any of it.

"And you're asking me why?" he said now looking into my eyes with his own mismatched pair. I felt myself trembling under his gaze; I could still see the irises glowing, even with the lights turned off.

"I-I was just thinking about starting one…" I told him truthfully, looking away and refusing to meet his gaze, trying to pretend to be interested with what was going on with the TV. I heard him give off a small chuckle.

"Someone at work catch your eye?"

I might have cared for him, but at times like these I could understand why Rachel called him a dense idiot. "No…" I told him, a little sad. "Just thinking about it."

"Probably not the easiest choice to make," Ragna told me. "You got an idea of where you'll live if you decide to start one?"

"Yeah…" " _Wherever you are.'_

"How many kids you'd want?" he'd asked, just to make conversation.

"Just one… but maybe more if we felt like it," I told him.

"We?" he asked, cocking his head slightly.

"My future spouse and I," I told him with a sigh. Ragna gave me slow nod.

"Anything specific you're looking for in him?" he asked me before giving a small smirk. "Or her?"

"R-Ragna!" I burst out at him, slapping him hard on his left shoulder. Not knowing it was him was bad enough, but now he was just toying with me.

"Hey, I didn't want be an ass and _ass_ ume," he said with another chuckle and a somewhat playful smile, somehow making me feel a little less angry. "Still didn't answer the question."

"Well HE'S a… He's a different type of person…"

"Different?" Ragna asked me, a little surprised. I still wonder what word he'd been expecting. "What would be so different about him?"

"Well… he's the sort of person that's confident, but not many people can really appreciate it." Ragna stayed silent and continued to listen me. "He's kind to the people he cares about and would do anything for them. He's a great cook, constantly stays motivated, never lets others put him down, and… he'd make me smile."

I imagined Ragna saying something snarking, but instead he gave a gruff grunt and turned his attention back to the TV. "You've been watching too many of those sappy romance shows Noel; there's no guy like that on this planet." I nodded sadly and let my head hang; maybe it was a lost cause after all. But then I remember him ruffling my hair like he sometimes did when he teased me. "But if there was, they'd be lucky to have you."

For a few moments I couldn't speak. What Ragna had said was one of the kindest things anyone had ever told me. Gathering up my courage, I continued talking to him. "There's more to him than that. He's… he's already helped me back from despair before…"

"So there really is someone you have in mind," Ragna said to me giving a smile that seemed happy and encouraging. "What else can you tell me about 'em?"

"He… He's helped push me to do my best, to help get over my own insecurities, they've laughed with me, felt sad with me, and he… He gave up his arm to save me…"

Ragna seemed to realize what I'd been saying, who I'd been talking about this entire time. His face went blank as he stared at me in what I'd imagined was some mix of awe, disbelief, and even disgust.

"I know that I look like Saya," I continued as tears began falling from my cheeks. "And I know what we had to do, but I just can't go on feeling like a copy of your sister... What I feel for you Ragna, it's real! If you don't want me then just say it! ...Just tell me something."

Ragna had stared at me for a full minute before reaching for the remote and shutting off the TV. For a moment I was afraid that he'd simply stand and walk to his bedroom, but he didn't. "You know that it wouldn't be easy. I mean Makoto probably wouldn't care one way or another, but you know how much I piss off Tsubaki just by still being alive. Then there's my brother…" We both knew how much Jin had despised me. "Not to mention, most people wouldn't exactly going to treat anyone related to the _Grim Reaper_ with that much respect…"

"Are you trying to talk me out of it?" I finally managed to ask.

"Could you live with it?" Ragna asked me in turn, staring straight into my eyes, that look he gives people when he wants only truth. I wouldn't have to lie to him… not then, not now, not ever.

"Yes."

"...Just making sure," he told me, smiling at me warmly before leaning towards me. And that was our first kiss. After that we spent the rest of the night on the couch, just holding each other for comfort and warmth.

About a week later my parents stopped by again and I told them that we'd decided to build a family. The truth was we hadn't gone… serious yet, but I felt like they needed to know. I was surprised with how well they went with it, letting us know the two of us were free to visit whenever we wanted.

The next day we told all of our friends decision. Despite our fears, it seemed that Tsubaki was fine with the idea, though she made Ragna promise her not to do anything to hurt me, which he did without hesitation. Makoto was of course completely ecstatic for both of us, nearly crushing me in the hug she gave me. The only two who didn't seem as happy was Kagura who sobbed about ' _the one that got away,_ ' and Jin who bluntly told us, ' _If you know what you're getting into, who am I to stop you?'_ Ragna was going to get into another fight with them, but I managed to talk him out of it.

"Noel! Oi! Noel!" I heard Ragna call my name, snapping me out of my thoughts from a year and a half prior. "You coming to dinner?"

"In a second!" I tell him writing down my last thought in a journal and going upstairs to see him. Since a year ago we'd moved out of our old apartment into a small house in Kagutsuchi's resident district. The house itself hadn't been in great condition, but with Ragna's help we'd worked on the house and managed to turn it into our own. Once I was upstairs I saw Ragna start setting the table for some of the curry and rice he'd made for dinner while holding our 3 month old daughter, Mary in the baby carrier strapped to his back.

I'd given birth with Kokonoe's help and Mary was the end result. I'd made a bit of a bet with Ragna, if it was a boy I'd get to name him, but he'd get to choose the name for a girl. I'd expected him to choose the name Saya or Celica to reflect on two people important to him that he'd lost, but he'd chosen the name Mary. When I'd asked him about it a week after she'd been born he gave me a snarky grin and told me to think of my own name. Noel and Mary. Merry… Christmas. I'd glared at him and demanded if all he took that for was a sick joke, but he'd told me a different story.

"Merry is another way of saying happy… that's the life I want for our daughter."

I'd decided he had a point, but I still wish he'd thought of a less humorous name, Joy maybe? Oh well, maybe if we decide to have another one...

Ragna must have noticed me staring at them because his face became slightly concerned. "Everything okay?"

It was times like these that I realized how much has happened, how much we've had to had, how many good times we've had, how many bad, all of them lead up to one thing; the present.

"Everything's perfect Ragna... just perfect."


End file.
